Monday, June 15, 2009

How some things don't change

A conversation with an old friend prompted me to write this. Have you ever met someone after a long time and been surprised at how much you are able to connect (or still hate each other) after all these years. Initially, everything about this person seems different. He or She is probably doing better (or worse) than you expected. They look and dress differently. They even talk differently with usages that you did not expect. But after sometime, you begin to notice things and then alas its the same person who has just travelled through time.

The main point of this entry is actually to emphasize something else. We actually change (at the core) less than we think we do. For sure, our experiences shape and help define us, but exactly how it affects us depends largely on what we are able to absorb from it. And what we are able to learn from experiences relate directly to how we were before it. So that comes back to the point that we usually do not change too much after all.

The other point of this entry is to not expect other people to change too much for us. Sure, they should make the effort, but for the change to really take root, it is going to take some time and deliberate practise.

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